Dear Scotty,

Um, so…I live in Graham, and sometimes and there is this funk in the halls that will trickle into my own room, I’m not dirty, I do my laundry, and even take out the trash. How do I stop this so my friends will come hangout more often?

–Funky Fred

Dear Funky Fred,

First off, don’t live in Graham. Second, I praise you for doing your own laundry, there are some people here who either don’t know or chose to not do their own dirty clothes. Finally, the best piece of advice I can give you is investing in some kind of candle warmer. Whether it is for actual candles or for wax cubes, the $10 device is well worth it. All you do is plug it in and wait for it to work it’s magic! Your room is going to smell clean, your friends will comment on it every time they visit. Not to mention, there is no rules against it. Good luck, keep doing your laundry, maybe get some cooler friends,

— Scotty

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